“My favorite story is ‘After I Was Thrown in the River and Before I Drowned’ by David Eggers. I know, it sounds depressing but for me it’s joyous. It opens with “OH I’m A FAST DOG. I’m fast-fast. It’s true and I love being fast I admit it I love it. You know fast dogs. Dogs that just run by and you say Damn! That’s a fast dog! Well that’s me. A fast dog. I’m a fast-fast dog. Hoooooooo! Hooooooooooooo!” I could read that over and over. And you know what? Of course it sounds tragic, but it’s not. You should read it. “
Note from Maya:
This is my favorite story too. And I’m not a fast dog. I take things slow. Read the story here:
After I Was Thrown In the River and Before I Drowned by David Eggers
“I never really questioned traditional gender roles. As a female, I know I’m a bitch. My mom was a bitch, my grandma was a bitch, all the women in our family. I was raised that way and it never occurred to me to challenge it. Then I went to a dog show. Do you know what male dogs are called? Dogs! That’s why I march.”
Note from Maya:
I’m working on my own scarf for next year’s march!
“I struggled as an actor for a long time. My biggest role was in Waiting for Dogot. I’m not really sure why, but things got pretty dismal. I was unable to move forward in a meaningful way. Now I just wait for the phone to ring. Time will tell but I’m not feeling very lucky these days.”
Note from Maya:
Lucky is my favorite character in the play. He has a leash and drools. He doesn’t say much but when he does speak, it’s a real showstopper.
“Stop digging! Sheesh, I must hear that 10 times a day. It’s so menacing. Did Woodward and Bernstein stop digging? Barbara Walters? I too will not be deterred. Especially these days. Our democracy depends on it”
Note from Maya:
Keep digging dog! But if your pet is ruining your yard while investigating the big story, here is more information!
“I need you to open the gate and get me outta here. You saw the sign out front, right? I just can’t go out there and look like I’m endorsing him. It would go against all my values and the important policy issues I care about. I’m so disappointed. I never imagined politics would tear us apart like this. I’ll be okay. I’ve scouted all the campaign signs in the neighborhood and there are some safe houses nearby.”
Note from Juno and Maya: Luckily, our family all agrees on politics. We still get ourselves into a (non-rabies related) lather when discussing the issues.
Can Love Survive This Election?
“Hello Clarice.”
Note from Maya:
I’m no Agent Starling so I didn’t stick around to ask questions.
“Of course you can do it with the right attitude. Your’e the boss. Not them. There’s an art to sleeping on fine furniture or counter surfing before dinner. Digging up roses in an English garden is sublime. And yes you can go in a store even if you’ve never comforted a human in your life. Set your mind to it and they’ll be pushing you around in a stroller in no time. But first you’ll need to sign up for my seminar to learn how.”
Note from Maya: I’m not a fan. Maybe I should write my own book. Be sweet and love your humans and you will be treated like a queen - and get away with lots of fun stuff too.
“My favorite song? Well for sure it’s Resuce Me by Fontella Bass. It’s an oldie but goodie. Do you know it? 🎶 Rescue me ~ Take me in your arms ~ Rescue me ~ I want your tender charm ~ Cause I’m lonely ~ And I’m blue ~ I need you ~ And your love too ~ Come on Baby and rescue me 🎶. Its so good but I’m ready to switch it up. I’ll do a super fun sing-a-long song when I finally bust outta here with my new family. 🎶 Holy moly, me oh my ~ You’re the apple of my eye ~ Boy, I’ve never loved one like you ~ Ah home, let me go home ~ Home is wherever I’m with you ~ la la la la take me home🎶. We’ll be jamming the whole way home!
Note from Maya:
This is my new friend Beans and he is the cutest, sweetest, cuddliest (dare I say sexy) boy you will ever meet. He is 8 years old and currently resides at Mountain Humane in Hailely, Idaho. He’s been there 9 months already. Learn more about Mountain Humane at the link below. They have pledged to make Idaho a No-Kill state by 2025. Wow!
Update: Beans was featured in the local newspaper and was adopted in August! Check out the Mountain Humane Instagram for August 20, 2019 and his return visit on September 10, 2019. Love wins!
Look at that face!
🎶 Home is wherever I’m with you🎶
“This is my derpy look”
“I love my daily practice with my handler. I’m ready for my family.”
“Go ahead … ask me one more time if I speak softly. Let’s see what happens. I’ve used sticks for a lot more than fetching and chewing.”
Note from Maya:
People always give me advice on my posts, and this time everyone suggested “speak softly and carry a big stick”! So I knew it shouldn’t be the caption.
